Ramblings of a Crowe

Brilliance

"Do you need to borrow a rocket pack? Thundercracker! Pull a rocketpack out of your ass and give it to Optimus Prime!"

Comedy. Gold.

What Elgato has to Say about my problem:

Here's the email I got from Elgato today. It pretty much sums up what was happening with my computer. So maybe when this happens to some other unsuspecting fool, they'll find this entry via google and not be stuck scratching their head like I was.

A tip of the hat to Jeff, who called it. He was on the money when he said it was EyeTv. I have nothing against EyeTV at all. I think it's a great thing to have, and I'll probably use it again. The solution was simple, just a matter of fixing my preferences.

_____________________

Thank you for contacting Elgato Systems.

One reason the Mac may be starting up is related to your EyeTV Guide
preferences, if you have it set to automatically check for programs scheduled
via the TitanTV website (tvtv if you're in Europe or IceTV in Australia). There
is an option to wake the computer if necessary and this option can be disabled.

The file Wakein, located in Library/Application Support/EyeTV is responsible for
writing to the power manager on the Macintosh. Quit EyeTV, erase Wakein and a
new file will be created the next time you launch EyeTV.

There is a known issue with EyeTV Hybrids waking when plugged into USB hubs, but
I haven't heard of it with EyeTV 250 devices. We're working with Apple on a
solution.

Have you tried resetting the PMU/SMU? The PMU is a subsystem which controls low
energy and power related functions. You can find instructions for resetting your
PMU from apple's website: http://www.apple.com/support (the instructions vary
depending on which Mac you own). If you have certain G5 models, or an Intel mac,
then the computer has an SMU instead of PMU.

Regards,

Andrea Lindgren
Customer Support

Elgato Systems LLC

Tale of the Bodysnatcher...er Computer Snatcher....

We finally figured out what was causing my computer to turn on at will. After many emails, a few text messages, and a lot of digging around, the mystery was solved last night.

And who was the Highjacker?

EyeTV.

EyeTV was responsible for the strange starting up of my computer. After talking with my cousin, I got to digging around in the preferences and found some selections. One had EyeTV set to check every 3 hours for updates (hmmm....this is about how long it took my computer to turn back on). The other was a box that said, "Wake computer if necessary". Needless to say I disabled all of those.

Last night, the Mac stayed off all night.

Yay!

Thanks to Jeff and J who really helped me out. You guys are great!

Alrighty Then...

Last night I had a dream I was in Pirate's Cove, sifting for small gold cubes with a dragon, a robot, and two people I've never met before. We were being chased by something, but I managed to get a zippy bag of tiny gold cubes. The group ended up on a ledge, looking down on a wrecked pirate ship. Below was an Octurion, bright pink against all gloomy grey, waiting for us. I remember thinking sadly, "But he was on my team. Now I have to kill him."

:(

Huh...

Well, apparently it isn't my DVR causing my Mac to come on. However, I am happy to say it took 2.5 hours for it to finally power itself back on. I now have a time frame. Shutdown happened at 10:30 and computer came on at 1:13, according to my logs.

*sigh*

Could Apache or the Remote Desktop do this?

Gimme Your Glasses!

LOL! "Where are the glasses!"

One of my favorite parts in the movie--especially when the tires explode. Barricade does not take shit from anyone.

TV

Looks like my new TV will arrive sometime next week. Faster than I expected, actually. It will be nice to get my room back into order. Right now I have a small, 15 inch TV sitting on a chair in my closet. It isn't hooked up to the cable, and it doesn't get any channels. Its sole purpose is for videogames, which I haven't played in about a week...I'm slacking. Then we have all the wires and game consoles laying about, homeless.

Oh, and it'll be cool to actually, you know, watch TV again. I used Eye TV for awhile, but it was a pain. I had to make sure the computer wouldn't sleep on me or he screen saver start up. Jeff and I have a sneaking suspicion that Eye TV is behind the mysterious powering up of my Mac. I haven't tested this theory yet, but I will soon.

Anyhoo...gotta go back to work! (my job is awesome, btw)

Possessed Mac

So I turned my Mac off last night, just to see what it would do. Naturally, sometime during the night it turned itself back on. I know it took longer than an two hours for it to decide bring itself back from the land of computer shut downs because I was still awake at 2am and I had shut it down around midnight.

I'm not sure if I should be bothered by this. Everything else works just fine. No error messages, nada. Runs like a champ. It even puts itself to sleep (and for some reason doesn't wake up from that without a prompt--like it is supposed to). I've looked on the web for other people with this problem. Most of them are complaining about their Mac's coming out of sleep for some reason or another. Mine isn't doing that. It's turning itself back on completely.

I really don't want to screw around with sending it to be fixed if this isn't a big deal. I don't turn it off that often. Only once a week or so, and only for a few hours. It seems to be doing me a favor, by booting itself back up. LOL

*sigh* My luck with anything electronic is just...I don't know...

Monkeys Should Never Be Shrinks

Took my mom to see Transformers yesterday. It was my third show. Each time I go, I notice something I missed. Like the goldfish scaring the crap out of Frenzy. LOL Too funny! Or Starscream heading the barrage on Megatron near the end. Sneaky guy...

And of course, there's the stuff that still makes me go, "WTF? Why?" Like Sam and Micheala making out on top of Bee's hood at the end while the rest of the bots are hanging out. Isn't that kinda creepy? I dunno, maybe Bee enjoys it. * ew *

The dialog of this movie is just horrendously bad, but it makes me laugh because it is so much like the cartoons. Galvatron, anyone? LOL That guy is my favorite Transformer ever--just because he was such a fucked up psychopathic manic killer. Anyone who has watched the episode where Cyclonus tricks him into going to a mental treatment facility knows this. Best. Episode. Ever.

________________

"Galvatron, don't fight it. Just say whatever comes to your mind."

"Kill! Smash! Destroy!"

"Uh, yes..."

"Rend! Mangle! Distort!"

_________________

"Yes, tell me about the Autobots."

"I hate the Autobots. I hate Cyclonus. And I'm not very fond of YOU either!"

__________________

But my favorite part is when they give Galvi a bunch of junk pieces to put together to help him "reconstruct his damaged psyche." He builds a gun and uses it liberally. I nearly peed myself laughing.

And then, as our mental monstrosity fails at responding to various treatment, someone thinks it might be a good idea to for him to act out his problems with other patients. And this folks, is why monkeys should never be shrinks. Things go badly--for everyone:

One of the other patients starts a nonstop, nails on chalk, screaming. This displeases Galvi, who is already pissed off he's tied up and on a planet full of monkeys who are trying to screw with his head.

"STOP IT! Stop that hideous noise!"

Little monster keeps screaming.

"You want to scream? I'll give you something to scream about!"

Everyone starts running.

___________________

By the end of the show, I feel kinda bad for Galvatron. I mean, he's so distressed he actually starts to beg Cyclonus to get him off the planet. He says, "please", which I actually had to watch a few times to believe it. The mad monkey shrinks decide that Galvi's only hope is a lobotomy via hungry, brain eating spiders (not joking) who are extensions of the planet they are on--or some shit like that. The spiders actually manage to start eating Galvi's brain, but it gives the planet a serious case of indigestion. Yes, Galvatron is so crazy, he made the planet go nuts.

But this isn't the end...Oh, no. Cyclonus frees Galvi and then begs for his life. He gets off with a punch in the face. Galvi has other things on his mind...like blowing up the Monkey's home.

"You cannot stop me. I am Galvatron! I am your destruction!" He yells this at the planet, then dives into a ravine. Cyclonus pretty much sums up what we are all thinking right about now with one neat sentence:

"He is crazy."

____________________

LOL

I'd love to see him the movieverse, but I think Galvi is waaaay to intense for the bigscreen.

Paragraphs

Dear people who like to write stories,

For the love of God, when the speakers change, start a new paragraph.

Here, I'll show you and example:

BAD
"Hey, Annie! Can I borrow a pencil?" Bobby put on his best smile and looked at the girl next to him. "Not in a million trillion years, boogerhands," Annie said with a sniff. Bobby's face crumpled. Ever since that day Buster and his knobhead jock friends had caught him digging for gold at the bus stop, that nickname haunted him--Boogerhands Bobby. "I had a cold that day, alright?"

GOOD
"Hey, Annie! Can I borrow a pencil?" Bobby put on his best smile and looked at the girl next to him.

"Not in a million years, boogerhands," Annie said with a sniff.

Bobby's face crumpled. Ever since that day Buster and his knobhead jock friends had caught him digging for gold at the bus stop, that nickname had haunted him--Boogerhands Bobby. "I had a cold that day, alright?"

______________

See? Understand?

Face of the Akatsuki

So the leader of the Akatsuki is revealed to us, as well as his name, Pein. Interesting, I expected him to be--something different. He looks a lot like Naruto and the 4th (not that that really means anything). Even more curious: It appears someone else is calling the shots? But who?

Oh, and Manda is dead. So is Deidara. :(

__________________________________________

Ah man, Grimmjow. Why do I suddenly feel sorry for you? What a sad story, to struggle so hard and yet be humiliated again and again. Kubo has given us a glimpse of what life is like in the Hollow world. How horrible. But Grimm's hate is poisoning him from within--and I think that's why he's going to lose to Ichigo soon (though Ichigo is taking an ass beating right now). I hope he doesn't die though. They both have a common enemy--Aizen. If only Grimm wasn't so blinded he might realize Ichigo isn't part of his problem...

Harry Potter

So I saw the newest Harry Potter movie tonight. All I can really say is, meh. I enjoyed it, especially the fight at the end, but over all, it really didn't leave me with any impression. I could've waited for it to come out on video and been happy. The goings on at Barnes and Noble next door were more interesting. People lined up by the hundreds, dressed in all kinds of costumes. I love my books, but I can't imagine waiting in line until midnight to buy one. No thanks.

I'd be lying though, if I said I wasn't curious to see how it all ended. I imagine there will be internet spoilers ahoy in a few hours. I'm waiting for the drama bomb to drop. Places like SA and Fandom Wank should be great fun tonight--and for the next few weeks.

Pimp my ride: With Optimus Prime

LMAO

Best Quote:

"An alarm system? Who would steal me? I'd never get away from the truck. I am the goddamn truck!"

And, Prime getting owned by the Tonberry is friggen hysterical HERE. I've always hated those little bastards!

VOTE!

Producers want to know: What characters do fans want to see in the next Transformers movie? So here's the poll, get out there and vote!

It was a tough decision for me...Grimlock or Hot Rod....in the end, the Dinosaur won out.

First Mac Problem?

So as of yesterday, my Mac has decided to turn itself on liberally, after I turn it off. I find much humor in this, as when I had a PC, it was a problem to keep them turned on. I'm not biased to leaving my Mac on, and unplugging it seems to thwart any attempt to reboot itself (it usually takes it awhile to decided to turn itself back on anyway). I usually only shut it off once a week for a couple of hours anyway...but things like this have a way of nagging at me.

I double checked to make sure I hadn't accidently set any waking functions--and I hadn't. The only thing I can think of is that one of the options under power display reads "Wake for Ethernet Administrator". I've never fooled around with this option before, so I assume it has always been checked, and I'm hesitant to uncheck it.

Everything else is running smoothly, from what I can tell. It's just, I'll turn it off, leave for a few hours only to return to my computer being on. I know I shut it down, I watched it and made sure it didn't go immediatly to restart. So I'm not sure what the hell is happening.

*sigh*

New Job, New TV

Tomorrow I start my new job. I'm a little nervous, but actually kind of excited. Today I go in to fill out paperwork, and I had to go to the DMV to get a driver's thingy that tells how many tickets and crap I have. I was surprised to see my seatbelt ticket was on there. I'd totally forgotten about that. Hopefully I won't get dinged by this company. That would really suck. That was the only ticket I have though and it was four years ago (almost five). I always wear my seatbelt, but that day I had left work, got a quarter mile over the bridge before I thought about putting it on and then a cop pulled me over. >:(

In other news, I called Best Buy to find out why I hadn't heard anything about my TV. The tube crapped out in it only after 8 months, so under warranty, it was supposed to be fixed or replaced. That whole ordeal started a month ago, and today I decided I'd waited long enough. To my luck, I find out that Samsung had offered me a replacement TV as mine is unfixable. It's 100 percent comparable to the TV I have they tell me and it is a 2007 model. We shall see. I just want my HDTV back. I recently got the new Transformers game and want to play it. I'm using my 19 inch regular Samsung to finish up Dragonquest and Zelda (thanks to my cousin Jeff for helping me get past that part...even though he made it look insanely easy...).

Maybe things are starting to look up...I'm afraid to believe so still. My luck has been pretty crappy as of late. I feel like I'm watching over my shoulder, waiting for the hammer to drop on me again.

In other good news, I discovered that Pheonix Wright #4 is being offered by Amazon.com. Apparently it will release in January. I've already ordered #3, which is due in September. I'm so excited!

I Got A Job

So today the gods of the unemployed smiled on me (maybe) and I was offered a job doing collections for a local security department. Not exactly the position I was hoping to get, but it is a job and I was relieved--especially considering I spent 1300 dollars today on that damn car of mine.

I'm a little sad to leave behind my lazy days playing video games and reading books, but the relief I feel at the thought of being able to pay my bills on time puts a smudge of dark black all over those feelings. It's an 8 to 5 job, no weekends, so I'll still have free time. The only major bummer is I won't be able to take my Japanese 201 class this fall. I'll have send sensei an email, apologizing. :(

So lets hope this job goes better than the last. Doing collections isn't exactly something I think I'll enjoy, but we shall see. If it means I don't have to be nice to people, I should be ok. LOL

PS:

The first thing I'm going to do after I start this job is buy the old Transformers movie and make my son watch it with me 100 times. >:P

2

I saw Transformers again.

It was just as much fun the second time.

Word has it there are two more in the works. This puts a big smile on my face.

The scene that brought about Prime's best line in the 2007 movie:

Giant Robots Chase the Blues Away

I saw Transformers today.

I left the movie theater feeling profoundly more at ease.

That's because nothing is better than giant robots kicking each other's asses.

I would go see it again. In fact, I would've bought myself a ticket for the next availible showing--if I weren't so damn poor at the moment.

__________________________________

Ok, so here are some more detailed thoughts on this movie. I wanted to do this earlier, but I decided I needed to take a nap instead. Priorities, yo.

I loved this movie. My only disappointment was it wasn't longer...and there were no Dinobots. Maybe next time.

You see, I've always loved Transformers. As a kid, they were my cartoon and toy of choice. My best friend at the time, Zach, and I would have epic battles with our mishmash of Autobots and Decepticons. My favorite was Soundwave and all his little pals (at least until the Dinobots showed up). Optimus was pretty cool too, sort of like a dad out of the Walton's, except with guns and a sword. Megatron's voice always bugged me, like he'd smoked one to many stogie in his day. Starscream was a backstabbing pansy, but cool because he was a fighter jet.

Decepticons for some reason were decidedly more cool than the Autobots (once again, until Dinobots showed up). I mean, they had some of the baddest, meanest transformations. However, I still sided with the Autobots, because really, Megatron struck me as a narrow minded evil leader, not living up to his full potential. I mean, who can take the guy seriously when his second is Starscream?

Anyway--

As an old fan, I had a few concerns as to what might happen to my beloved Transformers when they made their bigscreen debut. I had heard rumors about certain changes and there was the whole Micheal Bay thing too. But I'm not disappointed in this film. I was impressed. And, I want another one. Maybe a few other ones. Lots of them.

Anyone who walks into this film expecting an Oscar calibur film is an idiot. It's not. What it is, is a summer action flick, and it does not disappoint. From the moment the movie starts to the minute it ends, it is nonstop crap blowing up, people getting thrown around, cars squealing down freeways, and badass robots smashing each other. It was pure bliss.

The chuckles were corny, but I laughed anyway because it fit so well with the old show I remembered as a kid. Jazz making stupid jokes, Optimus with his dry sense of humor (often not even realizing he's made a funny). I ate it up. I was impressed that they managed to stay true to the personalities of the characters. Sure, it wasn't a perfect carbon copy of the show, I can't complain.

As for specific changes made to certain members, most notably Bumblebee not being a VW bug, I thought they were all done well. Bumblebee as a camaro rocked. He was still spiffy and cool as ever. And friggen Barricade was just awesome as a cop car. Christ, when he interrogated Sam, I got chills. And Bonecrusher was there, representing the Constructacons, but not as his bulldozer self. That was fine by me, because watching him skate down the freeway, body check a moving bus and then Optimus was beyond any words in vocabulary known to man. A simple bulldozer couldn't have pulled that off. As for Prime, I thought his new look was cool and I really didn't give a crap where his trailer was, because in the cartoon it just vanished anyway. I always thought it was kind of stupid for him to have one in the first place. Megatron was...different. But not in a bad way. He looked scarier than hell and was mean as sin. Actually, I thought he was an improvement of his former self.

My only beef about the whole show are the humans. Sam was ok, not spectacular, but bareable. He was kind of stupid, which annoyed me. And the chick was just pointless. Why was she there again? She did gain points though, when she hooked Bumblebee up to the tow truck. That was awesome, but sadly her only bright spot in the entire show. Thankfully, the main focus was on the robots. Really, the humans were just the extras in this movie.

What it boils down to is the entertainment value in the end. This movie is entertaining. I told my mom to go see it, because I know she'd like it even though she isn't into stuff like robots, crap blowing up, etc. It's a fun movie that doesn't require much thought. Just sit back and enjoy the ride. And with that being said, I really hope they make more of them. I'll be waiting in line, that's for sure.

Here's something I never thought I'd see...

The Start of Neovisualisim

I'm not sure how I feel about this...

Guess I Didn't Get that Job

So it looks like the place I interviewed at last week has re-listed the position I applied for. Guess I didn't cut it. I was really hoping to work for that company too. It felt like a good fit and I would've enjoyed it there. I even called them today to check on the status, but no one called me back. I suppose this is my answer.

My mom tells me to keep a positive attitude. I try, but I'm failing miserably. I just can't see anything positive right now. Nada. Why sugar coat things. Life sucks now. I keep counting all the mistakes I've made, and it just kills me inside a little more each time. I'm really not sure what to do with myself anymore. No one wants to hire me, everything is going wrong. Right now, I feel like I'm turning in circles, not sure what to do or where to go.

LOL!!!!

So, today my car dies in the middle of the freeway (thanks to all the motorists who flipped me off and drove around me as I pushed my car to the gas station. Fuck off and die in a kitchen fire, assholes). 1200 bucks to fix it. LMAO!!!! With that much money I can buy a horse and build myself a damn buggy.

Unfortunately for me, I have to pay for the car to be fixed. Apparently banks don't give money to unemployed people. That means my money in the bank has dropped significantly, and now I have even less time to find myself a job.

Joy.

Not only that, but I was on my way to see Transformers when this happened, hoping the robots kicking each other's asses would make me feel better about how shitty things have been around here lately. >:( Now I'm at home, eating a cheeseburger and writing this blog which isn't making me feel much better about anything.

You know...I just have no words for my life lately. None. It's almost comical. Today I told my mom I hope I go to Hell, because God is obviously not on my side anyway and right now I don't want to play in that big jerk's sandbox. Cut me some slack! Geez!

Zombies

Why is it I can connect to the internet, yet many of my often used websites aren't working lately? Sites like hotmail, google homepage, WA state government pages, gmail, You Tube. The pages usually won't load, or when they do, they're all weird. At first I thought it was my computer, but I tried them on my parents computer had little luck there either. I've cleared my cookies, my cache, my history--everything I can think of. My security settings should be fine. I haven't changed anything and I've never had any trouble with these pages in the past.

I think I'm cursed.

That's the only solution I can come up with right now. With all that has been going on in my life, that would make sense. Maybe I'm a mummy and I haven't realized it yet? Either that or God just hates my friggen guts. Maybe both.

If I was a zombie though, because that's what mummies are, stuff like this wouldn't matter. All I would care about is shuffling around, groaning, and eating brains. Right now I do a lot of shuffling around and groaning, which supports my zombie theory. However, the whole eating brains thing....just ew. I guess two out of three is pretty good.

If I was a zombie, computer glitches wouldn't piss me off because I wouldn't know what a computer was or how useful it could be. I mean, come on, how many white collar zombies have you seen at Star Bucks these days? No, in a zombie's eyes, the only thing a computer is good for is throwing. Sometimes I feel that way too.

If I were a zombie, I wouldn't need a job. Zombies don't need money. They don't have cars or house payments or even credit cards. Zombies are just fine sleeping in a gutter or in your basement. Zombies can't drive, because many of them don't have eyes to see with (they rely on an accute sense of smell attuned to the scent of brains). Then again, the way people drive around here makes me wonders if Zombies have evolved and learned to manipulate SUVs...

If I were a Zombie, I wouldn't have to brush my hair or worry about buying new clothes or my apperance in general. Zombies keep things simple. Usually their hair falls out in clumps, so brushing is a bad idea. They wear the same clothes every day until eventually the fabric rots off. Zombies aren't prudes. Nudity is natural to them. They have nothing to hide, sometimes because most of it has rotted off. Have you ever seen a Zombie dressed in the latest Gap outfit? Didn't think so.

If I were a Zombie, I wouldn't have to worry about crime. Knives and bullets wouldn't hurt me. My only fear would be fire. And maybe lye...

Zombies have it pretty good. If only I were a zombie.

Quoted!

"One has to moderate spectacular with a bit of brown"

Truer words have never been spoken, J.

EMAIIIIIILLLLLLLLLL

Why can't I send email today? I have three accounts, and NONE of them work. Not any of them. I've been trying for an hour to send out job stuff to a company...THEY WON'T FUCKING WORK! And of course, my .mac trial is over with, so they want me to pay 99 bucks to reactivate it. Yeah, my unemployed ass will get right on that. Thankfully, I managed to start a .mail account, which worked just fine. It appears yahoo, hotmail, and g-mail have some sort of hate for my attachements. Even after clearning caches, history, cookies, I still couldn't get them to send my mail with attachments.

God, I'm so pissed off. If it isn't one damn thing, it's another. Lately, I feel like I could kick puppies.

Again...

I have literally spent all day applying for jobs. I even applied for jobs in Seattle and Vancouver, though I have no idea what I would do if I was asked for an interview. Every time I look at my bank account, I feel a sick desperation come over me. On Monday, I think I'll go ask for applications at places like Pet Smart and Target--part time, of course, so I can find something better.

Or something...

Some days I regret my choice to leave my other place of work--but then I remember how awful I felt going there and how hard it would be to find another job while working there. I am more bummed about the new unemployment rules though--a seven week penalty is stiff enough, but now it's seven weeks AND make seven times what you're previous employer would've paid you. You can't even get welfare, food stamps, or medical aide if you quit your job without 'just cause'.

I understand why the rules are in place--because there's a ton of assholes who are lazy jerkoffs. However, I'd rather have to wait all day in a DHS office and have my situation reviewed accordingly, rather than be damned by a blanket app. of regulations that probably don't even pertain to me.

At least dumpsters on the curb are community property. God bless America, keeping the homeless homeless and the poor even poorer. I can't wait until my car gets re-poed and my cell phone shut off because I can't pay my bill. That'll be great for my job search!

One thing that really irks me about looking for a job in this town is the amount of postings that require someone to speak Spanish. No, these aren't government jobs that deal with immigration either. They're jobs at banks, grocery stores, legal offices, doctors offices, etc. Jobs that I can do, but can't apply for because it's PC to not expect immigrants to speak the local language these days. I won't ever forget the guy who applied at TG and got pissed off because we didn't have anyone who could speak Spanish. He walked out of his interview, vowing that he would never work for a "place like that". LOL Like it was some sort of sin a company in the USA would--gasp--expect the people they do business with to speak English.

WTF is wrong with this country?

Anyway--

When the worries really start to get to me, I find this odd consolation in reminding myself, "There isn't shit I can do about it now." For some reason, that pacifies me and I can happily return to clicking though job listings on the internet.

For awhile, I considered trying out that mystery shopper crap. I discovered that it is actually a legit job, but weeding through the scams and the real stuff is too tedious for even my internet sleuthing skills. Plus, I friggen hate shopping.

That said, I did have an interview yesterday. I always do crappy on interviews. It didn't help that after slogging across the parking lot in 105 degree weather, I looked like a mangled poodle. The lady was really nice, we had a good chat, and when I left she said she would call me on Tuesday. There are three positions open, all of which I'm qualified for, but I'm not getting my hopes up. As much as I know I'd love working at this place, I don't want to be disappointed when I don't receive a call back--or worse, the obligatory "Thanks for applying, but--"

Back to square -10.

*sigh*

Can I Kill You for Research Purposes?

Over on You Tube I stumbled onto what might be in fact, the funniest show created by mankind. Oh, you Aussies! You kill me--but just not for research, okay?

Chasers War on Everything is an informative show, keeping people up to date on real world issues. Here's a few examples:

Do'in Laundry in the Name of God

No Love for Muslim Mosques

Americans Answer Difficult Questions

Crack Dealer

But His Buttocks...

Hell, I could go on forever. This show is full of gems. Check more of the clips out on You Tube.

This is one of the best ones yet:

Miyavi's new PV

You know, I didn't think I'd like this one, but I found myself tapping to the beat. It's catchy, not my favorite, but catchy.

Quoted!

"And as far as this current bullshit people from other countries tend to foist on average Americans about the Iraq War...please just shut the hell up. Look, we're just as upset as you are about the whole Iraq situation; I don't know if you've been paying attention lately, but about 75% of the US does not support the Iraq War, and about 50% hasn't supported it since the war started. So stop acting all snippy and treating me like its my fault that some jackass Texas legacy child felt like going and playing cowboy in the world's largest sandbox. I voted against him the second time and would have the first time, except for the fact that I was 15 at the time. I PROMISE you we hate him far more than you do at this point." --Colin, Gaijin Smash.net

A-fking-MEN!

Unemployed Again

But this time I'm not eligible for unemployment benefits. This search for a job part of my life is sort of like a game--and the level of difficulty has just gone up. Now I have time limit. I have to find a job before my money runs out or I'm screwed.

Fun. I'm already scoping out garbage cans with the best grub and the least bugs.

So how did I end up unemployed again? Well, my new job just didn't work out. I'm not sure if I made the right decision leaving it, but I do feel better about not having to go there anymore. The past two weeks were hell for me. I couldn't sleep, I had panic attacks, I cried. It was pretty pathetic. Last night was the worst. I laid in bed for three hours, just thinking horrible things. Eventually it began to feel like someone was stepping on my head. I actually got the shakes. Hello anxiety attack.

I went to work after a restless night and much convincing myself that if I didn't go I would surely die a rotting corpse in a dumpster somewhere. Today was the first day out on the floor, dealing with real customers. Once we moved from the training room to our small herd of cubes in the corner, I started to feel sick. I stared at the computer for awhile and felt dread creep up on me. For a moment, I wondered what the hell I was doing there. I felt the first pin pricks of tears. I don't know why I've become such a cry baby, but I think I need to see a shrink.

Anyway, I tackled my first e-mail from a customer and abruptly forgot everything we were taught in class. I realized there were so many avenues to fail at this job, the stress was just killing me. I didn't have a good grasp of my tools. I felt like I was floating in a cyber-netherworld. Thank god for J, because I probably would've bolted from my seat at that very moment. I realized during that first e-mail that there was no way I'd be able to take phone calls from customers--especially that afternoon.

I don't know what came next. I think I just gave up. Utterly defeated. Ka-Pow! I managed to get through another e-mail. It was a little easier than the first, but I still struggled with it. By that time I wasn't even interested in fighting to keep myself engaged. The thought of answering phones was nipping at my heels, a reminder that I was totally going to fuck something up because I had no clue what I was doing and feeling pretty stupid to boot.

As we left for lunch, I sort of walked down the hall in a daze. I really didn't know what to do. I sat in my car, thinking about the six more hours I had left in the day and how it would all start all over again tomorrow. The thought made my head feel like it was stuffed with cotton. I felt a little sick too.

I got out my cellphone to call my mom. I was going to listen to her tell me to solve my own problems again, then go skulking back in there and sack it up. I noticed I had a phone call, but no message. I hate it when people do that. I called the number back and got a woman on the phone. She had received my resume and called me, despite thinking I was over qualified for the positions they had open. After talking with her some more, I learned that the job is actually close to my home (I live in the sticks), Monday-Friday with some overtime, pays more than the job I was sitting there loathing, was a growing business that ships produce via railways, has about 70 people who are very close and have BBQs three times a week at work. Sign me up! These people speak my language--BBQ, produce, and dispatching.

I was so excited! We chatted some more. I told her about my current situation and that I didn't mind taking a position I was over qualified for. I was very interested in the job and excited to meet her. We set up an interview for Thursday.

I checked out of my current job completely right then. I might not get the job I interview for on Thursday, but I realized that there are better things out there. If I'm so unhappy I can barely function, I need to make some changes--even if it includes leaving my job. I'm just disappointed I didn't have the hindsight to see this sort of situation coming. It never occurred to me I might actually hate this job as much as I did--I was so blinded by my luck at having a new job so fast after being dumped on my ass my old job, I never really gave it much thought. I figured I could do any job thrown at me.

I learned my lesson.

I called the unemployment people and they told me I wasn't eligible for benefits because I left a good job voluntarily with no reason (other than it was making me insane). I knew that was coming, so I wasn't surprised. I even hit the unemployment guy up on tips on how to get a job with the unemployment agency. I mean hell, I could do that, especially since it means I wouldn't have to be nice to people. Government social workers have it good. >:(

So my tale ends here. I'm hoping I get a level up in the near future, because this game of life owes me one, I think. It's been a crappy couple of years, I'm due for a break or something! >:( As for the job I just left, I have no doubt that it is a great place to work. I could see good things in it, but it wasn't a good fit for me. I was the square peg trying to fit into the round hole.

Now I'm off to buy a couple lottery tickets. Wish me luck.

Mistakes

Why do I make so many of them?