Ramblings of a Crowe

Catching up with the times

I did something that I said I'd never do today. I bought a cell phone. I hate talking on the phone, as most of my family and friends will tell you, so I never expected to have a need for one of these contraptions. However, since I will hardly be home as of next week, I decided it would probably be in my best interest to invest in one.

I'm not much of a shopper. I hate shopping so I tend to just go in, find something I like, then buy it. Much less pain that way, though my pocket book would probably disagree.

So I only visited one place today before settling on a pretty cool phone, Motorola Slvr--or what ever they're called. After the pain of paying for it and realizing I've added another bill to my roster of payments, I got down to the fun part--toodling with my new techy toy. I'm not as saavy as J, but gadgets still catch my attention like shiney little baubles. I dinked around, set up voice mail, bought a ring tone, had a blast with the camera, etc. I discoverd my computer hates the phone, making wierd noises if it's in the same room.

Now I'm a cellphone owner. Weird.

Zoso goes to training

So I went to training for my new job today full of apprehension. Working in a nursery around plants and stuff doesn't scare me, but doing retail type stuff is totally new to me. I've never operated a cash register or anything like that. Counting change is new to me. Understanding pricing and inventory is completely beyond any learning I've had in the past. Still, the group of people I'll be working with seem to be fun and easy going. I had a good time.

I'm still worried about the whole benefits thing as well as taking huge pay cut and working only part time. I'm still waiting for the second job to come around. It will be at night. My future is pretty uncertain.

To top that off, I got a message this evening after I returned home. My old boss has called. I wonder what he wants. I have a feeling it's to come back to work; he's not the type to call just to check on me. From what I've heard, things are just going to hell since I left. I'm not tooting my own horn, but after eight weeks of lay off, my co-workers still call me to complain and ask for advice. The scheduling and dispatching has gone to shit, no one knows when or how to order chemicals, no one pays attention to the vendors or truck maintenance, stuff is breaking, techs are losing money, routes are screwed. Sort of makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

I don't know if I'll call him back. I loved my old job, but I hate that manager. Who's to say I won't get canned again right after I'm brought back? I know now my job there isn't safe. I'm the most expendable one, business wise. Do I want to work in that situation again? Do I want to work for a boss/company that just tosses me out the way they did, after seven years of hard work for them? Every part of me says, "NO".

Sure, the pay is good. I won't be scrounging for cash. I'll have benefits. But for how long? I'll end up being responsible for work the manager should be doing. I'll end up being responsible for the work his proxy no good field manager should be doing. I'll be responsible and not get paid for it. Do I want that? Do I want the headache that comes with the corporate bullshit? Do I want the drama? Do I want to deal with all the double talk and lies?

Not really. My responsible side says to go back, because that's what's best for my pocket book and medical benefits. However, I don't think it's good for my soul. The managers at my old job sucked the life out of me. J can contest to this. He's worked for them. As much as I adored my fellow co-workers and customers, the drivel the managers shoveled out on a daily basis really made me hate life.

When I was laid off, I was crushed. However, something else happened. I went out and got a hair cut. I hadn't had one in like three years (no shit--my hair was down to my ass). I bought new clothes. I started wearing my contacts and make-up. I started doing my hair. As depressed as I was about losing my job, I wasn't depressed about 'me' anymore. I felt free. Liberated. And that's not a joke or an exaggeration.

For seven years, that job had consumed me. It taught me to loathe life, to feel hopeless. I was caught in a wheel that wouldn't stop turning. Now I'm not. I don't have money to throw around, but as long as I can pay my bills, does that really matter? I plan on going to school. I know that's what I really want to do. It won't guarantee me my dream job, but it'll be a step in the right direction. I don't want to live my life, stuck someplace where I never know what'll happen.

So, do I want to go back?

No.

Should I?

I don't think so.

Once more, the activity log amuses me

I forgot I had an activity log on this blog. For some reason, today I remembered it and had the joy of going through nearly two and a half months of search requests.

Those of the SEKRET MeSsGe KLuB know why I'm giggling.

Most of the searches that happen on the blog are pretty normal. Lots of Bleach, SO3, msc anime and manga stuff being sought out. However, occasionally a stray wanderer stops by and pops in a doozy. For example, 'piss' and 'fat'. I can only wonder what was going through the head of the person who typed that into my search bar. Scratch that, maybe I don't want to wonder.

Pack Mentality

I spent most of the day watching TV, mainly that show called, "Dog Whisperer". That guy is incredible, the things he's able to accomplish with some of the weirdest dog problems (skate-board hater dog, TV hater dog???). He always gets me thinking about how different animals are from people--but also how similar we are.

I find the pack mentality interesting. Many animals, including ones that don't live in a group environment, seem to display some sort of primal hierarchy. Horses, dogs, people, some lizards, hyenas, cows, sheep, even cats.

Cats I find incredibly interesting. Domesticated cats technically aren't the 'pack' type of animal, though they can live together peacefully. Lions are the only cat that actually live together in an organized group setting. Compared to canines though, they aren't nearly efficient.

Domesticated cats operate on independence--one of the reasons so many dog owners dislike them. Cats don't seem to respond to authority the way dogs do. People tend to be pretty insignificant to them.

But is that really true? I got to thinking about this today, after watching "Dog Whisperer". There's definitely a hierarchy within my house when it comes to our cat. Sure, she's a pain in the ass, tears shit up, and is a lazy slob (like most cats), but she recognizes the dominant people in the house.

Her attitude to my dad is pretty insignificant. She seems to ignore him for the most part, and he does the same to her. Sometimes I wonder if they exist on different planes of reality and just don't see each other. Either that or she's still pissed off he brought the dog home. Who knows.

With my mom, I think the cat sees her as a threat. The predator in the house that throws stuff and carries a big red and white stick (candy cane). The cat definitely pays attention to mom. Not always in a respectful way, but enough that she doesn't go out of her way to invade her space or tear up her stuff.

Then there's me. I'm the one who will kick her ass and toss her out back with dog when she's being a rotten pain in the neck. I'm also the one that will stalk her, hide behind doors and leap out at her, tear up newspapers with her, and chase her around the house.

And last is my son. *sigh* She terrorizes him. Seriously. She purposely tears up his stuff--and only his (with the exception of toilet paper). She will eat his homework if he leaves it laying out on the floor. Not only that, she will sit right in the middle of him as he's trying to write or draw, and either swat the pencil from his and or bite him on the face (not hard) when he tells her no. If he doesn't get into bed on time (9pm), she will find him and bite him--once she even popped him in the mouth when he was talking to me as I was tucking him in.

She never hurts him bad enough to make him bleed. And of all the people in the house, she's closest to him. She seeks him out when she comes inside, goes to bed with him every night, hangs around him while outside. But she doesn't respect him.

When I or my parents tell her 'no', she stops what she's doing. She gets pissed, but usually that's the end of it. She leaves our stuff alone, even food. I can set an entire plate on the couch and she won't even look at it. But his stuff...it's fair game. I've never been bitten or scratched by her--even when I had the pleasure of dropping pills down her throat. She hasn't hurt my parents either. But she'll bite and scratch the kiddo; hands, face, ears, toes, legs, whatever is in reach.

Basically, she bullies him. When she wants to sit on my lap, she slinks up to me, her head down and body close to the floor, or she sits on the floor and waits for me to tell her it's okay. With him, she just jumps into the middle of whatever he's doing. I've watched her lay down on top of his home work and bite the pencil from his hand. *shakes head* It's his own fault. He won't tell her no and when he does, he's a wimp about it.

It's different than the way the dog interacts with us. He sees us as his pack and knows who the bosses are. Unlike the cat, he's pretty clear about it. However, I think from the cat's subtle actions, she has a firm understanding who ranks above and below her in the house. She just pushes the boundaries more so than the dog, because that's what cats do, even among themselves.

I like both cats and dogs. Dogs for their loyalty and cats for their independence. They're both very different creatures, but that's what makes them interesting. Maybe next time I'll talk about my pet sheep and how their herd mentality is akin to that of a biker gang. You guys will never view sheep in the same light again, I assure you.

Cute and fluffy my ass.

Wow....

Final Fantasy XII sold 1.7 million units in its first four days of release (in Japan).

Well, there goes my life...

So today I accepted two jobs. Yup. Two. Two part time jobs, each between 20-30 hours a week. I'm not sure how I'll work it, but we'll see. The lack of medical benefits sucks, but I guess I'll just go buy my own. I imagine that'll cost me a pretty penny. Either that or I just hang on and see if I can get low cost insurance through the college.

You read that right. If all pans out with Financial aide...Zoso is going back to school.

Damn...

I graduated college five years ago. I have three degrees, but I find them not doing me much good--mostly because they're only AAS degrees. Everyone wants a Bachelors or higher now. It used to not be that way. They don't care what it's in. Seriously, I know a lot of you who read my blog are a decade (or more) younger than me--I have some words of advice for you:

Go to school and study what you love. If you don't, you'll regret it. Trust me. I do. If I knew then (and I know you've heard this) what I know now, I would've had a degree in art, English, linguistics, or something of that sort. Employers don't really care what degree you have, just so long as it's of the 'higher level'.

If you love English, get a degree in English. If you love Biology, the field is wide open. Go for it. If you love computers, man, you've got it made. College might seem like a pain in the ass, and it can be, but so long as your studying stuff that interests you, it'll be fun.

I love natural science, I don't totally regret my degrees. I learned a lot from them and gleaned skills from the jobs I applied them to. But it's not enough to prepare you for the unexpected. In my case, getting laid off after seven years at one business. Now I find myself stuck in a working world that praises Bachelors degrees and not much else. I wish I'd gotten one five years ago.

So back to school I go, full of new worries and uncertainties. How will I pay for it? Will I qualify for financial aide? How will I work around school? Can I pay my bills? How much time will I have for my kid? Is this a good idea? Am I doing the right thing?

Sometimes you just have to stop making excuses and take the plunge. Stop being scared of making mistakes and just DO IT. If you fail, you've learned something. Pick yourself up and try again. I seemed to have forgotten these lessons while working at my old job (the life sucking pit that it was).

Today was probably the busiest day of my layoff. I've been on the phone with my two potential employers (pretty much a given), talking to them about what I intend to do. One is a little leery of my endeavors, wondering how I will pull it off, but if it doesn't work for her, I'll find someone else it will work for. The other is more flexible, probably because I know them personally. *shrug* I spent the late morning and early afternoon at the college, then came home to talk to a counselor from the university here in town. Now I'm waiting to get my FAFSA all squared away.

I'm done moping around. Time to kick some ass.

Where do I go now?

So it seems all my prospective jobs have fallen through. Either the promises of being called back haven't happened, or negotiations have just not worked out.

So now what do I do?

I have nothing. I've exhausted my network and am at a loss. All I have is the newspaper and worksource, but after almost 8 weeks, they've produced nothing.

What happens to me?

Sadly, no one can answer that. Not even me. I'm not sure what to do at this point. I still have unemployment, but only until June at the latest. Then what?

I'm fast reaching a point where I just don't care.

I'm so tired.

The Libertine

Today I treated myself to a movie and lunch, hoping to relieve the boredom of my unemployment.

I went to see "The Libertine", starring Johnny Depp. I'm not sure why so many reviewers give this show a thumbs down. I thought it was brilliant, provocative, and a refreshing change of pace from all the cookie cutter Hollywood type movies we see over and over again.

To be quite frank, the film isn't as gaudy and raunchy as I thought it would be. Sort of, "Clockwork Orange" with a regal twist. But it was tasteful, hardly pornographic. Only one lady got up and didn't come back...too bad for her. The second half of the movie was the best.

Depp as Wilmont is just phenominal. In all honesty, if it weren't for him, the movie would be nothing but a lewd story about a cynical man with syphillis. However, Depp jumps right into Wilmont's masochistic, hateful personality and makes it impossible for us watchers to turn away from him--sort of like a trainwreck kind of way. I'm convinced the man had a death wish. Why he chose liquor and a disease that slowly rotted his body parts off just blows my mind...

As the prolog of the story says, "You will NOT like me". Indeed, but we will certainly be intreagued by you.

Depp deserves an Oscar. As of late, his performances in films is astounding, right on par with the greats like Tom Hanks, Tommy Lee Jones, and Harrison Ford. Granted, he's not as old as they are, but that only gives him room to become even greater. I hope he succeeds.

Give the man a damn Oscar already!

And go see this movie. It's worth the money.

Spring Anime to watch

After a less than stellar fall and winter season, I'm happy to say that Spring is looking up for us anime watchers. To tell the truth, I only watch Bleach and Naruto these days, mainly out of habit (all the fillers...though Bleach isn't too bad).

So here are a few I'm excited to see:

Nana For those who don't know about Nana, it's probably one of the best manga I've read. Even though I'm not keen on a lot of shojo stuff, this one just sucked me in. The story is about two girls named Nana, both come from very different lifestyles and are VERY different people. Somehow, while moving to Tokyo they meet on a train, then end up as roommates. So their story begins...

And then there is Host Club. I can't tell you how excited I am to see this animated. The manga is HYSTERICAL. I laugh my ass off when I read it. Not a deep story, but just friggen funny. For those that don't know, a Host Club is an establishment of sorts in Japan that caters to men/women. Customers go there and pay to have drinks poured for them by beautiful 'hosts'.

In this story, a bunch of bored rich kids have set up a host club at their school. Led by Takami, aka The King, the group has quite the reputation. Enter Haruhi, boyish looking girl with an apathetic personality. She breaks an expensive vase and is bullied into becoming a host--mistaken for being a girlie looking boy. She has to work off her debt (did I mention she's a lowly poor scholarship student?) under the reign of Takami. Luckily he's dumber than a box of melted crayons.

If your a fan of anime, I highly recommend these.

You know your boredom is bad...

...when you sleep to avoid being bored.

I slept almost all day. No reason other than I was so bored I could barely stand myself.

Oh, I could read, play Shadow Hearts or Animal Crossing, even write or draw. But I've done those things so much lately that I'm sick of them. Having no money to go do fun things sort of puts a damper on getting out of the house too.

I really need a job. Hopefully I'll hear back from my one and only prospect soon.

I think tomorrow I'll splurge a little and go see a movie. I thought about that today, but I hate going to the movies on a Saturday. Too many damn people everywhere. Goes to show how desperate I'm getting, being cooped up for six weeks...

News Flash! Color is EVIL! Like Harry Potter!

Harry Potter may be the final Pied Piper, leading children into the Abyss by the tens of millions.

Oh yes, a book will be the undoing of us all, but I don't think it's gonna be Harry Potter. You can read aaaallll about it.

You know, I just don't get this. The purpose of fiction is to tell a story, a fabrication of the imagination. That's all Harry Potter is--just a damn book. By this logic, not only is Harry Potter evil, but pretty much the entire fantasy genre. But does anyone pitch a fit about Disney's "The Sword in the Stone"? It's about magic. But noooo, 'cause ole Walt came up with that one and it can't possibly be evil!

WTF kind of thinking is that?

Sorry, I forgot that logic doesn't apply to batshit evangalistic Christian fundies. God forbid children grow up with rational thought processess or imagination.

I mean seriously, what the shit is this:

Originally, I believed it possible that she might be using colors which were Mind Control triggers, so I asked Cisco Wheeler to review them in this light.

Mind Control Triggers? Hot damn! I'm gonna run out and buy me some pinwheels! Maybe I can oooga booga someone into giving me a job.

I wonder how this person feels about the millions of crayolas used nation wide? No wonder our kids don't learn crap in school these days! They're mesmerized by their crayons! Damn you, Satan! It's your fault the US is so dumb!

Jesus in a motorcade...

I don't even like Harry Potter that much, but this stuff just makes my mind boggle.

Falling Down

There's an art to falling on your ass. Yes, it's true. You can fall down correctly or you can fall down and break something. A lot of businesses are required to give saftey meetings on how to prevent accidents and "Falling Correctly" is usually on the agenda (Thanks OSHA).

But honestly, how many of us have taken a sudden spill and actually had time to think, "Oh, I better tuck my elbows, use my forearms, and roll with the intertia?"

Sure as hell not me...

So let's take this time to share stories about times we've fallen on our asses. Sport stories don't count. People fall down in sports all the time--in fact it's encouraged. I'm talking about that sudden, one minute you're walking and the next you're on your face type of fall. Those are funny.

I fall down a lot. It started when I was five. I fell down and split open my chin on the driveway. Scared the hell out of my mom. Blood everywhere. I still have a scar. I fell down outside of Best Buy. I tripped over the curb and landed in the flower bed--right in the bushes. Another time I tripped over the plastic thingy under the computer chair. I seriously thought I broke my back on that one, since me and the chair both went flying and I ended up landing on one of the wheels.

BUT--the 10 on my chart is the time I was carrying the cat outside. It had snowed so the concrete path by our kitchen was slippery. I was wearing tennis shoes, being very careful as I stepped over the ice, cat tucked under one arm. Suddenly I was falling. I don't know how, since I was moving so slowly, but my ass had a one way ticket to the pavement. Somehow I managed to hang on to the cat, lifting her over my head so I wouldn't fall on her. But this left me with no way to brace my fall. I ended up on my back, half on the pathway, half in the flower bed. The cat was hanging over my head, the most astounded look on her face. She didn't even try to get away she was so stunned.

People falling down is funny. I can't help but laugh, even at myself.

Offical Announcement

Viz Media has officially announced that it has secured the rights to Bleach anime.

This was a no brainer, hardly a surprise.

Now I need to find a full time job to support my anime, manga, and videogame habit.

Check this bitch out...

There are a lot of idiots in the world, many of them use the internet. Usually I just take this as a fact of life and move on, but every now and then, one pops up that really grabs my attention:

lol, you drive a bus for a living... your parents must be so proud.

Taken from here.

What a bitch. And a dumb one at that. Mocking someone because they're a bus driver making 11 bucks an hour? You know what, people like this need to be drowned and tazered all at the same time.

All those jobs people make fun of, like the bus driver, the garbage man, the guy who mows lawns, the people who clean sewers and septic tanks, or whatever--they're fucking gold. I shudder to think what this country would be like without people to do these jobs.

I don't want to drive my trash to the dump once or twice a week. Maybe this moron has time to do that, but a lot of us don't and even more won't. Shit, some of us can't even make it to the dumpster outside and back. I'd like to see her pump her septic tank when it over flows. And obviously she doesn't realize how bad traffic would be (especially in large cities) if it weren't for these lowly bus drivers driving car-less people around town.

LOgIc Doze NUt CoMPuTe...*BOOM*

But I guess you can't expect much of a person who goes to an English speaking forum and posts in Japanese (while being a white girl from Jersey). Not only that, but it's bad Japanese, though she rubs her "fluency" in the face of all the forum members there after they start telling her to use English.

I hate people like her. It's one thing to be bad at a language that's not yours, most people cut you slack, but it's another to be a complete pompous bimbo and not know what the hell you're talking about while claiming you're fluent at it. Nine years my ass.

How is this fluent?

きゃあぁぁぁ！新らしiPod Nano『白い』の名前：ラビート（RABBEAT）:p
でも背中がSUN　MICROSYSTEMのローゴ.

She's trying to say: Sqeeeeaaal! My new iPod Nano's (white) name is Rabbit/Rabbeat(?). But on the back is the Sun Microsystem logo.

新らし<---someone tell me how this happens. Please. I've been staring at it for awhile now and I can't figure how the hell she managed to do this. "Ata" doesn't even prompt the kanji 新 in IME. In fact, IME gives you the friggen word! You CAN'T misspell this.

(for those who don't understand, IME is what processes roman letters into Japanese kana. From there, it will give you a list of kanji for the kana combinations and you can choose which one you're looking for. Atarashii becomes あたらしい becomes 新しい.)

Not only that, but she uses senaka 背中 for the word, 'back'. However, this only refers to the backs of people or animals, not inanimate objects. The word she needed was uragawa 裏側. And ローゴ for logo should be ロゴ. I'm not sure why she uses demo でも either, though I guess it works.

Then there is the matter of her horrible grammer. Japanese grammar isn't hard.

It should look something like this (I'm omitting the fangirl squealing because it's annoying as hell):

新しいiPod Nanoの名前はラビートだ。しかし、iPodの裏側にはSun Microsystemsのロゴがある。

Now I'm NOT fluent. I make a hell of a lot of mistakes. Stupid ones. New language is hard, but I have no pity for jackasses like her. She's so vain that she argues with someone who is obviously fluent--and loses badly. However, she still persists in justifying herself. The exchange between them brings whole new meaning to "Bitch got owned".

In the end we learn that she used to study Japanese. Sort of like how she doesn't like anime and manga, but has them listed as favorites in her journal, I suppose. Eventually she slinks off to her own journal where she tries to be witty, but any lack of coherent sentences make it impossible to read.

And she claims to be a member of MENSA...and if that's true, when did they drop the bar so low? You don't get much stupider than this broad.

Gag Order < Anonymity

Saddam argued further with Abdel-Rahman, complaining about the closing of the session and insisting he wanted to help stop the violence. "I am trying to extinguish the fire with few drops of water," he said, according to a person close to the trial, speaking on condition of anonymity because of the judge's gag order.

If there is one thing in the world that needs to separate other than Church and State, it's Journalism and Judicial Proceedings.

****

Fucking Duh:
Outgoing editor of Harper's magazine, Lewis Lapham, who recently criticized Bush for being "a televangelist who engages the United States in a never-ending crusade against all the world’s evil", told Aljazeera.net the president should be impeached.

And from the same article, numbers that make me beam:

According to various polls, 63% of Americans believe invading Iraq was a mistake, 70% have lost confidence in George Bush, the US president, as a war leader and 72% of US forces in Iraq believe the US should be out by year’s end.

Too bad most of the US was too stupid to figure this out in the beginning. Three years? I weep for my country...

Then again, this article comes from Aljazeera...not exactly the pinnacle of truthful reporting and a stand out example of how to bias facts into your favor--or just make them up completely.
*sigh*

A Flamer's Diary

I don't enjoy reading stories that butcher the English Language or totally disregard canon in all shapes and forms.
I don't enjoy reading hardcore wannabes flap their jaws in some pathetic attempt to sound 'tough' on the interwebs. Want a lollipop? Might sweeten up that sour disposition your fouling the air with.

I'm not nice, so don't let the name fool you.
So you're mean AND stupid? And this is new to the internet how? Please spare us the boring unoriginality and think up something fresh. *waiting to be amused*

If your writing sucks I will tell you.
Fair enough. Writing can be improved. Unfortunately for you, you're doomed to have a sucky personality your entire life. Do everyone a favor and don't breed, please?

Don't expect any helpful tips here.
No problem. As if you have anything useful or insightful to say anyway.

As a matter of fact don't expect anything from me at all.
Why am I suddenly picturing some emo teenager locked up in a dark bedroom with black decor, hunched over a computer while listening to Evanescence? (Look! You missed a comma! Does this mean you hate yourself for butchering the English language?)

Take all your grievances and complaints elsewhere because I don't give a crap.
You don't give a crap enough to give a crap about telling us you don't give a crap. Ok, I'm confused. Which is it?

My constructive advice (because I do care):
Up the dosage of heroin. And when you cut yourself, make sure it's up and down and not side to side, okay?

(note: this wasn't taken from a personal review.)

Zoso gets a job offer

So I actually got a job offer today. Amazed and elated, I am, but also worried. It's not full time, nor are there benfits. I'd get about 30 hours a week until July, then it tapers off. However, I think the job would be a lot of fun, and it's something I've never done before--sort of.

The big bonuses are it's outside, but not the grueling labor like that of my former job. I get to wear a hot pink shirt, which is good for a few funnies, and the people seem to be really nice. I'm also confident that I'd do a good job.

I'd have to work weekends, which sucks. But not that I do much anyway and I'd be out of there by 7:30 anyway. Oh, and I wouldn't start until April 1st.

I suppose I'm at this point where I shouldn't be picky. I'll take a serious hit to my income, but what am I supposed to do? *shrug* I'll make it work somehow.

I do have another interview today at 2pm. It is for a full time job, though I have no clue what for. *laughs* I actually sent a resume in thinking they'd never call me back. Surprising enough, I got a phone call Friday night. So I'll see what they have to say, but I doubt anything will come of it.

So, I am happy I actually have an offer to work. The lady was really impressed with my interview and me personally. Kinda embarassing, but it made me feel pretty good.

Maybe I'll go back to school. Working part time and getting my BA degree in...something...isn't such a bad idea.

(I'm still holding out for the online retail job though... *wink*)

Bleach Anime is Licensed?

Well, it's not a sure thing, from what I understand, but according to Viz they say Bleach is the property of Shueisha, the parent company of Viz. Since it's such a big hit, there's a high probability that eventually it'll come to the US.

So, this is pretty much news that everyone has already assumed. Big deal. It wouldn't shock me in the least to see an offical release date of late fall or early next year.

And if your one of those who cries when crap gets licensed, I don't want to hear it. Nothing annoys me worse than elitist fan boys and girls (hell, they don't even have to be elitist).

Blue Flower Blues

Today I grew blue pansies. It was cool. Then I caught a peacock butterfly. I put it in the museum. Apparently they like blue flowers. And I gave 50,000 bells to Tom Nook and I only owe 50,000 more. I left some oranges to rot on the ground too, in hopes of attracting flies and ants.

All in all, my virtual day was pretty productive.

I wonder how it went in the real world?

My town starring as the setting of a novel?

Whoa! Color me surprised. I picked up a book today and I can't tell you how weird it is to read the name of my po-dunk little city being used as the setting for a story about werewolves and vampires. It's strange, in a cool way. Especially seeing the police departments being referenced--as if they'd be able to handle vampire or any other supernatural problems. Ha ha hahahaha hahahaha haha!

Okay...anyway...

See, where I live, it's sort of the forgotten land. However, it's one of the largest areas (city wise) in Eastern Washington. But that's still super small potatoes when compared to the Seattle area and such. They've got all the people, but we make the food. *heh* Lots and lots of farms here. Not surprising since this area grows many of the nations crops, out producing even the midwest in wheat production with less acres (Zoso is an Ag. nerd).

When people think of Washington, they...probably think of Washington DC, but that's not what my point is. Their second thought is probably green trees, forests, and crap like that. Yeah, we're called the Evergreen State, though a lot of this state is hardly green. Try dusty, dry, and friggen hot like Arizona in the summer (not quite that hot, but 105 isn't uncommon around here, nor is 110 degrees in the dead of summer). Only the west side is lush and green, but come east of the mountains and you'll find sparse forest and eventually nothing but sagebrush and sand. It's amazing shit grows here as well as it does, but contrary to what wine snobs will tell you, France has nothing on our grapes (California does though :( ).

Anyway, it's just weird seeing this small city being used in a book. I've lived here my whole life and it kind of makes me laugh. Nothing exciting every goes on here. There's the occasional murder and sometimes a fat man riding a motor cycle with nothing on rides down the street, but that's about the jist of it.

Though I think it's cool, I have to wonder why the author picked such a no name, listless place such as this?

*is ded*

It took me ONE TRY to talk to the Unemployment Office today. ONE TRY!

Maybe this is a sign...and omen? Good or bad, I don't know...

England, Here I Come!

I began today with my usual morning ritual of waking up and going, "Oh shit. Another day." Then I mosied on over to the computer to being my daily job search online.

After finding very little there at the local city site, I started searching other places. I ended up on some website called Careers Northwest, playing some game with a fish and a bunch of clams. It was fun. But being the dumb American I am, it took me a while to realize the site was for the United Kingdom and not the (Pacific) Northwest here in the US.

I can't even afford to move to Idaho, so certianly the British Isles are out of the question...

Grandia III

I read one review of this Grandia III that said the story was 'uninspired', and I couldn't help but wonder if we played the same RPG. A brother gone mad, a sister on a quest to save him, a boy who dreams to fly like the eagles--I personally found the story to be completely captivating.

The same review also mentioned that the reoccurring theme of hope and dreams was 'hokey', and once more I had to boggle a bit. If having the passion that Yuki has for his dream of flying is corny, then sign me up--I'll gladly trade in my procrastinating, worrisome attitude for a bit of his 'insipid' courage...

What is refreshing about Grandia III is the lack of melodramatic heroes. The emo level of your party is low, if non existent. That is a breath of fresh air, if you ask me. Personally, I think the sulky, angry, dark type of character is far more over-played than a young boy who dares to have a dream and the will to make it come true.

So on that note, the characters in Grandia III are totally likeable. Sadly there isn't a lot of delving into their pasts, but since there's quite a bit of dialogue between them, you learn about their personalities as the game goes on by talking with them. There are plenty of funny movements between them, which adds a good dose of humor to the game.

The scripting is good too, keeping well with in the tone of the game and I absolutely loved the voice acting. Even the bad guys were well done--when more often than not, they're over done (the laugh of Albel Nox, anyone? Or how about Albedo in Xenosaga? Ugh...now that I think about it, they were voice acted by the same person, I believe...).

The settings were beautiful, though I did have issues with the 'jaggies' in the graphics at first. Eventually I got used to them, but I think with a little more effort this game could've been totally breath-taking in the scenery department. Still, the different environments are interesting and not hard on the eyes in the least.

Speaking of environments, I do wish they were more interactive and not so linear. Town exploration is fun, but when out in the wild more often than not your stuck to following a single trail--and you can't get off of it. There are a few places where the setting is wide and trail-less, but only a couple. I suppose this is made up for by the expanse of some of these dungeons, many of which can be confusing to navigate as the game progresses--so you spend a lot of time wandering around. You can interact with the environment at given points, such as making plants blow up, cutting down trees and mushrooms to find stuff, treasure chests, etc. Every so often a ledge will fall out from under you or you'll have to push things around.

Music is always important and the opening song for Grandia III is a prime pick for this game--upbeat, inspiring, and fun. As for the rest, I'll have to say it was pretty good, though not outstanding (as was the music in say, Star Ocean 3).

But the big clincher for this game is the battle system. It's fantastic! In the left hand corner is a circle with all the combatants. Their icons and those of your characters rotate around this circle, going through stages of command entry, command execution, and wait. The entire premise of this system is to try and stop the enemy from executing their attack--and during boss fights this is a necessity. To optimize your rotation around the IP Gauge, it's imperative to boost skills, find equipment that enhances movement, etc. Some of the enemies are so fast they'll make two rotations before you've even made one (tears hair out). Though it's a bit complicated, it's pretty easy to learn after about an hour or so. In no time, you'll be executing cancel attacks and arial finishes right and left.

Another important factor in the battle system is learning the numerous special moves that each character has. Special moves use SP, and as the character grows the SP bar grows with them. It is imperative to manage SP wisely. Special moves often cancel enemy attacks and the bigger ones can downright kill their asses. However, if you drain your SP, you'll have to wait for it to fill back up. Depending on what skills, accessory, armor you have equipped, this might take awhile. In certain battles, that's not an option.

Skills and magic aren't learned in this game. You have to buy them or find them in the field. And even when you do find them, you have to have the money to extract them from the gems and books they're locked inside of. AND then you have to make sure your magic level or skill level is high enough to equip them. AND you can only equip them in a shop or at a save point. Not only that, each character uses a mana egg to boost their magic, so if a character has mainly fire spells, it's best to hook them up with something like a Blaze Egg, Volcano Egg, Blast Egg, for example. Skills are boosted by equipping the characters with skill books you find laying around--the concept is the same as that of the mana eggs.

It took me about 50 hours to finish this game. I hear it can be done in 30, though I think you'd have to rush through it. I spend a lot of time exploring and talking to people. The NPC's in Grandia III often have interesting things to say and sometimes it's fun to hear the exchange between them and your characters. Sometimes if you come back to a town later, you'll get to listen to more of an on going drama going on between city folk or villagers. There's no side quests really, which makes me sad. Well, in one town you can help a boy solve a mystery, but that takes about five seconds. *laughs*

Over all, while this game has a few flaws, it's a stellar RPG. I highly recommend it to any of the RPG fans here. BTW, this game has one of the most fantastic endings!

Ahhh, I feel better...

Now that I am through having a fit, I'll be posting another pick-me-up:

Hmph...

You know, this whole not having a job thing is really starting to get to me. At first, I was worried but fairly confident. Now I'm beginning to think things are going to get really bad soon. People tell me it'll work out, and I do appriciate their good wishes, but I don't see much light at the end of my dark tunnel. At least eight interviews--all rejected. *sigh*

The breaking point for me was today after checking the mail and finding that my unemployment check is still missing and another rejection letter in the box. I think for the first time during this whole mess I actually cried over it.

What the hell am I doing wrong? And why the fuck is my luck so god damn shitty?

All. I. Want. Is. A. Job.

I'm a damn hard worker. I do a good job. I'm nice to everyone and give it my all. I'm not afraid to take on tasks I've never done before. What am I lacking? What makes me so unappealing to potential employers?

Perhaps I should move. Maybe I should take that job in Idaho--providing it's availible. I'm beginning to think I should've done that in the first place--but I didn't want to leave my friends and family, not to mention uproot my son from everything he knows. I really want to stay here. But what I want doesn't matter much these days.

Everyone tells me to be patient, that it takes a while to find a job. How long is a while? Unemployment only lasts so long, and apparently mine isn't coming at all this week. I don't know what pisses me off more, having to sit on my ass Monday and call those fuckers or the fact that it didn't show up at all. Then there's the lingering fear that the next one won't come either.

Stupid government offices. This crap always--ALWAYS--happens to me.

Shit...I'm in such a bad mood now it's not even funny.

Life Without Healing

Man, I think I get to the end of the game and my healer gets kidnapped. *sigh* Now I'm scrambling to cover, teaching my heavy hitters healing spells and my 'black magician' status enhancing spells. Makes for a rough time...especially when you have to manage their skills too and adjust for the loss.

But I suppose that's part of the fun. I was happy the game didn't end, though I could've done without my favorite character getting whacked. That really sucked.

I'm slowly working through my pile of 'unfinished' games inbetween looking for new work. On that note, I hear work has gone to hell in a handbasket. *laughs* Their scheduling is all screwed up and the boss doesn't seem to give a damn about it. I got a call from one of my old co-workers this evening who needed to vent--and to tell me we're having an all you can eat hot wings night at the sports bar next Wednesday. I miss those guys and I miss my job. However, I don't miss the bullshit and crappy managment that goes with it.

I hope I find work soon. I'm still losing sleep over it. I suppose I need to rely on my inner Godzilla, right Shazaam? (BTW-LMFAO@your blog!!! You won't mock the apple maggot once I become an apple maggot trapper! You watch! I'll squish thier maggoty heads! Oh, your neighbor is a dumbass! I wondered who the f**** dropped a mobile home trailer into the turn lane! Jebus on a motobike!)