Ramblings of a Crowe

People

Yesterday, a friend of mine made a comment that I should 'grow up and get a real job'. This conversation started when I told him I couldn't spend much money at the moment because I was laid off from work. Now, I get laid off every year for about eight weeks, sometimes more, sometimes less, depending on the weather. I know my layoff will happen so I set aside money to take care of important things, but I greatly reduce my spending during this time--which I think is the responsible thing to do.

My job is very 'real'. I work for a Fortune 500 company and we take our business very seriously. I've attended meetings in different states, stayed at fancy hotels, and rubbed elbows with some very successful and affluent business people. During the spring and summer, I'm very busy. Sometimes working 10 hours a day, six days a week. On occasion, it's not uncommon to put in 50-70 hours in week. I listen to people complain, I help my co-workers and our customers. I diagnose problem areas when our techs get stumped. How is this not a 'real' job? Because it's considered 'seasonal'?

I'm paid well. I have decent benefits. I use the degrees I went to school for. All seems pretty real to me. Perhaps his comment was made because he landed a government job and makes a lot more money than I do...who knows.

But it was J who uttered a profound statement last night, after I told him about the conversation, that left me thinking. He said that people judge us by their own lives and their own standards. What's right for them, the feel must be right for everybody else.

I never really thought much about it, but it's so true. I can't even begin to count the times I've received unsolicited advice from people who never even bother to think about 'me'. They rattle off what they think is right for me, but really all they're talking about is what's right for them. Perhaps their intentions are well meant, but it's really very rude and inconsiderate.

Of course, then I began to worry how many times I've done this myself. We all do it, but at least being aware of it can make a person stop to think before they open their mouth. Then again, some people just seem to have no off button that runs from brain to mouth, so there's probably little hope for them. *sigh* Or you have people who honestly believe that their way is the right way and there is no-other-way. I really feel bad for these kind of people. They're so wrapped un in their narcissism they can't see beyond themselves. What a sad and narrow-minded existance this must be...

I know I'll think twice before I try to give some one some advice. Am I really addressing their problems, or am I just talking about myself? A question to ponder, indeed.

As for my friend, who I do adore, I gave him a little leeway. He's one of those people who doesn't choose his words carefully. I'm used to it, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't annoy me. I laughed at him and told him he needs to pick his words carefully, because he's one hair away from seriously pissing me off. He apologized and I clarified to him all the points above that my job is indeed a 'real' job and I happen to like it. To run out and spend money doing fun things with him right now wouldn't be responsible, nor is my money or what I do with it any of his business. Enough said.

Posted by Zoso at December 20, 2005 04:35 PM