Today, my sister put up some links on her blog (where do you find this shit?) and I took the liberties of playing around with a few of them. Mostly the ones pertaining to asteroids and mass destruction.
My favorite is this one. You see, little known to many of us commoners, there lurks this large asteroid (aptly called Asteroid 234308oefndf97434-1 Delta Niner) in our solar system. Every so often, this asteroid crosses our beloved planet's orbital trajectory (look at me using big words wrongly!) Without being too dramatic, this spells out BIG FUCKING TROUBLE if the timing is right.
Anyway, after studying the noted link above, I came to several of my own conclusions:
1.)That this site is best viewed while using a horseracing announcer's voice.
2.)While eating popcorn and going, "Oooh! Oooh! Oooh!" when the near misses occur.
3.)Venus gets shmucked first (this may change from viewer to viewer)
4.)Mercury is an arrogant little bastard.
I don't think we have much to worry about. We'll get side-swiped in 2029, but from what I can tell, 2080 is the Big DayTM. Of course, there could always be a collosal behemoth plowing right for us at light speed and wipe us out tomorrow, but since we'll never know what hit us, I'm not to uptight about it.
This page would be a lot more fun if I knew what the hell all the big numbers meant. However, not being smart like that has its advantages. Random numbers are pretty entertaining. It only took me three tries to melt 24% of the earth.
Then I got this one:
The Earth is completely disrupted by the impact and its debris forms a new asteroid belt orbiting the sun between Venus and Mars.
Mission complete!
Posted by Zoso at October 7, 2005 07:41 PMThe Earth is completely disrupted by the impact and its debris forms a new asteroid belt orbiting the sun between Venus and Mars.
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I received this answer every time. I even made the diameter the size of a pea and it still gave me that. But then again I did have it going at 10000000 km per second. I can just see it now, killed by an asteroid the size of a pea. Not a very worthwhile death huh.
I could understand an asteroid the size of the sun coming and killing us all. At least then you know you would die a very dignified death, instead of being killed by a pea of a rock. That's just sad man.
Damn! 2029... I'll still be alive then... And I'll probably just have finally paid off my student loans. I know that we are only supposed to be side swiped, but who knows how much damage "side swiping" can do on a planetary level. Side swiped... lol, that asteroid is probably bigger than my state. Well if that doesn't kill me then I have something else to look forward to in 2080. It's really neat that they can come up with these models to show the orbits of the planets.
Posted by: Mia Hoshifaia at October 8, 2005 12:12 PMBut then again I did have it going at 10000000 km per second.
L. M. F. A. O!!!!
Here's another one I got:
The Earth is strongly disturbed by the impact, but loses little mass.
100.00 percent of the Earth is melted
The impact does not make a noticeable change in the Earth's rotation period or the tilt of its axis.
The impact does not shift the Earth's orbit noticeably.
Whew! I'm glad to see the orbit and axis tilt wasn't messed up!!!
****
Mia, just send yourself a memo. Right it down on a sticky note: "Buy brandy, lawn chair, the apocalypse is coming via big ass asteroid." Oh, and don't forget sunglasses either. Then again, I think by that time no one will be able to go outside anyway, so you might want to scratch that idea all together. :P
I'll be dead in 2080. At least, I hope so. If not, I'll be 104 and long over due to kick the bucket, so I suppose it would be an awesome way to go!
Posted by: Zoso at October 8, 2005 01:10 PMLol. It would be like the Beverly Hillbillies. (can't spell, I know) Sitting on the porch drinking. "Ma, waz tha?" "Well sonny tha's a big ass asteeroid comin' to kill us."
Zoso, sorry to burst your bubble, but with the medicine today, you will probably still be alive at 104. *wince* And you'll prolly be begging for that asteroid to hit us. 104... How slow do you walk at that age?
I'm pretty sure I'll kick the bucket before then. Unless of course, they start pulling a Futurama stunt and keeping heads alive in jars. Then I'd be pissed.
Posted by: Zoso at October 9, 2005 06:01 PM