Have you ever had a week full of Mondays?
It seemed like all week it was Monday, just one bad thing after another, but despite it all, I'm feeling pretty good. It's surprising actually...I haven't felt this energetic in a long time, and today I found myself wondering if something was wrong with me! *laughs* Despite all the drama of this week, I found time to visit with several friends, get some stuff done around the house, go shopping, and tomorrow I'll be seeing a movie with a friend. Usually I just tuck myself away in my house when the going gets rough, but lately I've been handling drama fairly well. Good for me. I get a cookie.
Hunter came home today. A week earlier than planned. He called me on Tuesday and said he wanted to come home. I found it strange so I asked him if that's what he really wanted to do and if so, he needed to tell his dad first. I called his dad on Wednesday to talk with him and make sure that Hunter really wanted to come back and it became a borderline argument. Of course, I try to remain objective, since it's always been my stance that Hunter and his relationship with his dad is thier own business.
Cody felt that Hunter wanted to come home because the two of them had a disagreement, and he though Hunter should just stick out the remaining week. Irritated with the both of them, I had him put Hunter on the phone and I asked him why he wanted to come home and if he was angry with his dad. He replied "No!" in a startled voice, so I told him fine, he could come home, but I made it clear that this was his final decision and there was no turning back. He would come home for good and that was it. He was totally fine with that.
Cody and I talked about it some more, and I told him Hunter had to make his own decisions and live with them. My parents would pick him up on Friday and that was the end of it. If Hunter decided to change his mind....Tough....he was coming home.
I knew there was something else going on....I knew the minute Hunter called on Tuesday and said he wanted to come back. Many people view me as a stand-offish mother, because I'm not a worrier and I don't baby him. I'm blunt and direct, sometimes I can be abrasive...but I'm like that with everyone, including Hunter. However, I am perceptive....and I know my son better than anyone else. For him to call and say he wants to leave his dad's house set off a ton of alarm bells in my head.
Hunter loves his dad very much. The two of them are incredibly close and spending any time they can find to be with each other is important. Cody works a lot and so the summers are a big deal for the both of them. Hunter looks forward to seeing his dad a month out of the summer and we've never had this problem before.
Knowing that, I asked Hunter several times if something had happened between him and his dad that made him want to come home. He told me "no" over and over, and I believed him. Hunter would tell me if he and Cody had a serious argument. Hunter tells me everything. I've made it very clear to him that I will always listen, no matter how bad it is, so he's comfortable coming to me.
Anyway, when I got home today, Hunter was swimming and already had a friend over. I kind of wish my parents would have asked me if it was okay, since I would have liked to spend some time with Hunter by myself. No big deal though. Later, he managed to find some time to come into my room where I was watching the Tour on TV and give me a big hug. I noticed he was trying not to cry and that's when he told me that his step-mom, Ronnie had called him a "selfish brat" because he was choosing to come home. He also told me that she had said several uncalled for things to him earlier during his stay, telling him that maybe her own son "didn't like him" and stuff like that.
Needless to say, I'm friggen pissed right now. I don't even think that honestly describes how mad I am. I almost called them, but decided it would be better to wait until I calm down...I have a nasty temper and when I'm this upset, things wouldn't be pretty. I did manage to ask Hunter if he told his dad what she had said, and he told me no, his dad knew nothing about it. I told him he needed to tell his dad when things like that happen, and I stressed how important that was. If his dad wouldn't listen, I told him he needed to call me and I would leave work if I had to, to go get him (the live two hours away).
I'm pretty sure Cody has no clue what was going on. He's protective of Hunter and I can't see him letting her say stuff like that to Hunter. I'll find out though, since I fully intend on calling him tomorrow and letting him know how I feel about the situation. Oddly, his wife and I get along too, but I've never really "liked" her. I thought she was okay enough, and I was a bit surprised. However, I believe I know now why Hunter wanted to come home, and why he's reluctant to go back up there any time soon.
My mom shrugged it off, which only made me even more mad. I wasn't mad at my mom, just the whole situation. Cody and I have worked very hard to maintain a good friendship with each other and it's worked out really well. My family loves him and I've never worried about Hunter going to his house...EVER...Both of us feel it is more important to get along so Hunter will be comfortable and happy. He's a good guy and loves Hunter, but sometimes he's just so stupid (the main reason we aren't together). I have very little patience for "stupid".
What kind of person says something like that to a little kid who is homesick? What kind of mom puts down a child the way she has? Perhaps she's just pissed because her two kids are hellions...honest to God brats...while Hunter has manners and is well behaved. He's not perfect, I'm aware of that, but compared to her two, he looks like a saint. Her daughter steals money, her son is ADDHD and impossible to deal with. She insecure about Cody and I's relationship, despite the fact it's more than obvious I want nothing to do with him. I know the two of them have been fighting. Hunter's told me about it. And now she's taking it out on Hunter. She even had the nerve to lie to me and say she made Hunter do the summer homework he was suppose to do while he was away. She lied even after Hunter told me "No mom, I haven't worked on it at all." Why would my son lie about NOT doing his homework when it would get him in trouble? *shakes head* I told Hunter that wasn't very responsible of him and even if Ronnie or Cody didn't make him do it, he should have done it on his own.
I don't know if he'll go back. If he doesn't want to, I won't make him. Cody will have to make some serious considerations and set the dumbass wife of his straight if Hunter is to go and visit again. If he won't do it, I sure as hell will and it won't be nice.
Overall, Hunter seems to be okay though. It's like he's almost relieved to be home. He dried his tears after talking to me and went back to playing with his friend, though he slips into my room every so often to sit with me and talk about things like tennis, the Tour, drawing, Naruto (which he's DYING to catch up on), and how bad the movie Spiderman was. *laughs* I'm so glad he's home. I missed him so much and I feel so bad for putting him in a situation where he was hurt. I suppose it's one of those life learning experinces and I'm sure there are more to follow....
Posted by Zoso at July 23, 2004 09:52 PM